desperately wanting

  • I want the big, fancy house with a private swimming pool, but I want it to be in the city. Is that too much to ask?
  • When I consider options for the next adventure trip, my top three places (now that Iceland has been checked off the list) are: New Zealand, Japan, and an Antarctic cruise.
  • Though there are still some places in the US I’d really like to see: like the Grand Canyon, Alaska, Maine, and NYC.
  • I want a big blue sapphire ring with a diamond halo. 
  • And a pair of Manolo’s. I’ll take these or these
  • I’ll also take an orange Siberian cat. 
  • And a trip to Paris.

That’s not asking much, right? 


I know some people hate New Years resolutions, but I love them.  Here is what I hope to accomplish in 2015:

  • Read 50 books. This should be easy. I surpassed that this year.
  • Be more active. I’m not putting any pressure on myself about a certain number of times per week I need to be exercising. (In fact, I plan on canceling my gym memberships.) I just want to run and walk more. Maybe ride my bike.  I don’t want it to feel like a chore. I’m over that. I’m never going to be that super fit chick. I’m never going to hit the gym every single day. That’s just not me.
  • Be more body positive.  Finishing up my reconstruction has helped a lot with this, but I still need to work at it. I am way too critical of myself, and it really brings me down.  That’s silly.  I am beautiful. Inside and out. It’s time to start acting like it. I’m going to own that in 2015. I’m done with being my own worst enemy. I’m 35 years old. I’m over it. I even told the bf that I want to be naked on the beach in Belize next year because fuck it that’s why. 
  • Strengthen relationships with friends and family. I’ve already started on this one, and it makes my heart happy. 
  • Travel. On the list so far: Iceland, Boston, Wisconsin, Chicago, Hawaii, and Belize. 
  • Try something new every month. It can be anything: a new food, restaurant, hairstyle, activity…you get the idea.
  • Be more present. Less social media. Less cell phone. Less work distractions. My people deserve more of my attention. 

I think these are reasonable. It’s not like I’m foolish enough to think I’m going to magically turn into some super fabulous version of myself or something. However, I do want to be constantly improving. Otherwise, what’s the point? 

2014 Book List

  1. Allegiant – Veronica Roth
  2. The Lonely Polygamist – Brady Udall
  3. Ghost Story – Peter Straub
  4. How To Be A Good Wife – Emma Chapman
  5. Me Before You – Jojo Moyes
  6. Eleanor & Park – Rainbow Rowell
  7. Lies You Wanted To Hear – James Whitfield Thornton
  8. Fangirl – Rainbow Rowell
  9. The Never List – Koethi Zan
  10. If I Stay – Gayle Forman
  11. Reconstructing Amelia – Kimberly McCreight
  12. Where’d You Go Bernadette? – Maria Semple
  13. The Waiting – Joe Hart
  14. House of Glass – Sophie Littlefield
  15. Attachments – Ranibow Rowell
  16. The Magpies – Mark Edwards
  17. Speak – Laurie Halse Anderson
  18. The Martian – Andy Weir
  19. Breast Left Unsaid – Jude Calligros
  20. The Winter People – Jennifer McMahon
  21. Promise Not to Tell – Jennifer McMahon
  22. You Should Have Known – Jean Hanff Korelitz
  23. Before I Go – Riley Weston
  24. The House Next Door – Anne Rivers Siddons
  25. Dark Lullaby – Mayra Calvani
  26. Still Missing – Chevy Stevens
  27. Heart Shaped Box – Joe HIll
  28. Lineage – Joe Hart
  29. What Alice Forgot – Liane Moriarty
  30. The Guilty One – Lisa Ballantyne
  31. Me, Earl, and The Dying Girl – Jesse Andrews
  32. The River is Dark – Joe Hart
  33. Before I Fall – Lauren Oliver
  34. Charm & Strange – Stephanie Kuehn
  35. Complicit – Stephanie Kuehn
  36. Everything I Never Told You – Celeste Ng
  37. The Silent Sister – Diane Chamberlain
  38. Landline – Rainbow Rowell
  39. Three Wishes – Liane Moriarty
  40. Help For The Haunted – John Searles
  41. The Girl You Left Behind – Jojo Moyes
  42. Falling Into Place – Amy Zhang
  43. Big Little Lies – Liane Moriarty
  44. Not That Kind Of Girl – Lena Dunham
  45. Fifty Shades of Grey – EL James
  46. Flatland – Edwin Abbott
  47. The Tender Bar – JR Moehringer
  48. One Plus One – Jojo Moyes
  49. On A Hill – Michael Whitehouse
  50. The Last Letter From Your Lover– Jojo Moyes
  51. After I Do – Taylor Reid
  52. Turn Of Mind – Alice LaPlante
  53. We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves – Karen Joy Fowler
  54. We Were Liars – E. Lockhart
  55. Conversion – Katherine Howe
  56. Contact – Carl Sagan

I haven’t yet decided what to read next, but I doubt I’ll finish it this year (though it’s possible). My goal was to read 36 books this year, so I’m quite pleased that I somehow managed to read 56. 

My top 10 of 2014:

(in no particular order)

  1. The Girl You Left Behind
  2. Landline
  3. Me Before You
  4. Not That Kind Of Girl
  5. Heart Shaped Box
  6. The Martian
  7. Eleanor & Park
  8. Attachments
  9. Fangirl
  10. One Plus One

Basically, Moyes and Rowell for the win. But read The Martian if you like science fiction, because it is amazing.

fitness update

Tues 8/5 – rest day
Wed 8/6 – 30 Day Shred (Level 3) Holy shit!!
Thurs 8/7 – rest day
Fri 8/8 –  rest day
Sat 8/9 –  30 Day Shred (Level 3) & 3.5 mile run (with Danielle)
Sun 8/10 – rest day
Mon 8/11 – rest day
Tues 8/12 30 Day Shred (Level 2)
Wed 8/13 – 30 Day Shred (Level 1) but with extra weight.
Thurs 8/14 –5.6 mile run (with Danielle)
Fri 8/15 – National Relaxation Day. (rest day)
Sat 8/16 – 30 Day Shred (Levels 1 & 2)
Sun 8/17 – 30 Day Shred (Level 3)

  • Too many rest days last week. It rained a lot so I didn’t get to run.
  • Level 3 of 30 Day Shred is rough.
  • My goals for this week are: (1) to run at least 3 times; (2) Level 3 at least 4 times; (3) no more than 2 diet sodas per day, and (4) More vegetables.
  • Next week I plan to start incorporating Ripped in 30.
  • I worship Jillian.
  • I have added a vitamin D supplement to my diet.
  • I am obsessed with Greek yogurt.
  • I need to buy heavier weights. Progress!
  • I’m in the best shape of my life at 35-years-old, and it feels amazing. ❤

fitness challenge

I’ve decided to challenge myself to be really on the ball with my fitness for the next 30 days.  I’m doing a 30 day plank challenge, as well as the 30 day squat challenge

I’d like to work on my arms, but that is slightly more challenging with these implants.  I need to work the arm muscles without engaging the chest muscles.  It’s harder than you’d think. Since my mastectomies, I’ve realized that we use our chest muscles kind of a lot.  Feel free to pass along any suggestions. 

Oh and I’m adding half-marathon training into the mix as well. I have a 16 week program I’m starting in June. 

my stats


128.5 lbs

Waist: 27 inches

Hips 36 inches


It’s hard to take a decent full body pic with this phone, but you get the general idea of what I’m working with.