Her mother was dead, but what could be worse than knowing your mother was alive somewhere but she wanted a man who hit her more than she wanted you?
The Mothers by Brit Bennett
We brought in Thanksgiving Day by toasting to our fourth Thanksgiving together and watching the finale of The Sopranos. I have all these feelings I don’t know what to do with. Haha. But now I must sleep because it is almost two a.m. and there is much food to cook later.
Sometimes I have these moments of panic where I question whether I’m a good enough mother. His happiness is so important to me. I want him to grow up to be well adjusted and happy. I worry that I’m fucking it up, and instead he will hate me. I worry that he’ll be sitting in a therapist’s office saying, “My mother ruined my life when she left my dad.”
- My sister is hitting me up for money again via Facebook. I want to yell at her: I’m not your fucking ATM, bitch.
- I’m thinking about just blocking her. I’ve only ever blocked three people on FB, and only have one person blocked currently (a crazy ex-client).
- The other two were my old boss and my bf’s ex-wife.
- My associate signed his very first client today. He looked so proud. Aww.
- I heard Chris Cornell’s cover of Nothing Compares 2 U. *all the heart eyes*
- I absolutely adore Ryan Adams, but I’m not really feeling the 1989 stuff. Maybe I need to give it time.
- More episodes of Black Mirror? Fuck yes.
- My kid is having me read Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone to him. He’s growing up way too fast.
- I’ve gotten some really nice compliments this week that made me smile.
- I think we are leaning toward buying a place downtown. *squee*
- My kid has discovered this horrid song called Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae). I die a little inside every time I hear it.
- I’ve decided to stop being so hard on myself. I decide this like every six months so we shall see how long it lasts this time.
- What a delightful weekend. Now I shall tackle my usual Sunday evening anxiety.
- Dave and I are obsessed with My Fitness Pal. Friend me if you use it (username: lawgirljenn). Tomorrow will be one week since we started the great vacation slim down diet. I’ve peeked at the scale, and it’s looking good.
- I’ve been super active this week/weekend. We walked almost everywhere. My legs are sore.
- Jackson is in Texas so I don’t get to pick him up tomorrow night. I’m super bummed. I miss his cute little face.
- But I bought Mario Kart and the necessary accessories today. He’s going to be so thrilled. I can’t wait to show him.
- I was getting kind of down on Birchbox, but then I got the April box on Saturday, and OMFG it was full of win. There is a sample of perfume that is fucking delightful. I’m going to buy the full size bottle. (I love sandalwood so much.)
- The new Jill and Kate acoustic covers album is just lovely. My favorites are: Insensitive, Wrecking Ball, and All Too Well. I’ve been listening to it on repeat in my car (and maybe I cry a little). It’s on Spotify now, along with Heart of Stone, which is also amazing. It was exactly one year ago that I met them at their Heart of Stone release party. I’m so happy for them.
This song reminds me so much of stuff from my past, and I always cry when I listen to it. It’s a great song, but quite sad, imo.
For some reason, I’ve been feeling a bit out of sorts this week, and I’ve been listening to this song quite a bit because of it.
I can’t stop listening to this song. First of all, it’s a good song. Second of all, it reminds me so much of how I felt last summer.
I love Tegan and Sara so much. I’m way excited for the concert. It’s next weekend! I have been waiting to see them for years.