Category Archives: blogging

throwback…

to the first ever pic D posted of us on Facebook. People were still way grumpy back then about our relationship. Well…his people. My people were like omg it’s about fucking time you moved on. Only my friends “liked” the pic. Haha.

We look so different now. I remember that night vividly. D’s band was playing a show at Just John in The Grove. A bunch of my friends came out. It was a good time. We used to always go to Steak ‘n Shake after those shows, mostly because it was the only place open.

I miss my long hair. Fucking cancer. Grr.

It’s so crazy how much life can change in just four years.

Anyway…this pic makes me smile. Thanks, Facebook. You don’t always suck.

the firm

I second guess myself way too much considering I’m almost always right (when it comes to work stuff that is). I guess it’s better to be safe than sorry?

Anyway, I just won a battle on behalf of two clients whose money had been garnished and I ended up getting the money back. All of it. Boom.

Winning always feels good, but it feels especially good when you win against an opponent whom you actually respect/admire. I must be doing something right. I guess. (<< see…i did it again).

We extended a job offer today for a legal assistant position. Should she accept, which I suspect she will, she will be our 5th employee. How the fuck is that even a thing? I still vividly remember when Scott and I were sitting across from each other, just the two of us, in a shared office space. We answered our own phones, scheduled our own appointments, made our own copies. Fuck, sometimes we even did house calls. The idea of having even one employee was a total mind fuck at that point.

Anyway, she (the newbie) will start mid-January. Just in time for busy season.

Though, honestly, every season is busy now, so I guess I should call it busier season.

Sometimes I think about how far we’ve come and I start to feel anxious. I try not to think about it too much. It feels precarious, like it could slip through my fingers at any time. Why do I deserve this? Yes, I worked hard, but so have others. Why me? Why now?  It’s hard to relax.

Things are great. Business is good. My employees are awesome. The law partner and I are getting along better than ever. But I’m so burnt out. I need a real vacation. I need to get away from this place for a bit.  I want to runaway and elope on a beach, and then spend a week drinking, sleeping, banging, reading, swimming, and zoning out. If it doesn’t happen soon, I may cut someone.

I feel the weight of this firm resting heavily upon my shoulders. There’s only so much one person can take. What is my breaking point? Hopefully, we don’t find out.

Nobody said it would be easy, am I right?

Not easy…but worth it. Always worth it.

stuff

  • D wants me to blog, and so blog I shall.
  • I walked/ran 2.5 miles tonight. I had to dig deep. I did 1.5 the day before. Baby steps.
  • But…I joined Club Fitness tonight so I’m ready to get my pump on.
  • And tomorrow I have my weekly meeting with my trainer, so go me.
  • I’ve been consuming way less alcohol as well. *pats self on back*
  • Currently reading two books: The Vanishing Year & Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail.
  • Last night I finished Tiny Beautiful Things and absolutely loved it.
  • Reading is my jam.
  • So is Obama 2020. I adore Michelle Obama.
  • My ex texted me today and asked me to call and help him pick out health insurance, which I did because what was I going to say, but I’m giving him all the side eye right now. Like why can’t he do anything on his own?
  • Tonight I tucked Freya into bed and she gave me a kiss on the cheek. *heart melted*

me before you

Yesterday, I was hardly on social media at all (and hadn’t been for a couple of days). Instead, I read, napped, ran, cleaned, hung out with the kids, watched tv with Dave, etc. I was in a great mood, despite the fact that I was feeling poorly. I started thinking about stuff I want to do: like sign up for a painting class, get back to knitting, shredding (30DS), thrifting, hiking, etc.

Today, I checked out Facebook and scrolled Tumblr and I’m in a much worse mood. I’m feeling blah and vaguely annoyed, though I can’t even articulate why. I’m wondering if I should deactivate my Facebook account for a while and also limit my Tumblr consumption. Maybe even unfollow some people. I follow too many people. It’s hard to keep up. It begins to feel like a chore. On top of that, then I see things about people whom I normally like that makes me not like them and then I’m conflicted and just ugh…this is unnecessary stress. I have way more important things to be worrying about.

When I limit myself to certain blogs, Instagram, and my own blogging, things feel much more positive. I don’t want to be one of those people who stick my head in the sand, but I also don’t see the point of beating myself over the head with nonsense. Social media nowadays is a deluge of “The world is coming to an end” versus “Stop being a whiny little bitch.” Opinions are like assholes: everyone has one. That doesn’t mean that I want and/or need to see/hear yours all the fucking time.

So yeah…I think I may be done with social media for a while. I need more positivity in my life.

what’s the story, morning glory?

  1. We finally have WiFi. You have never seen a happier family. Haha.
  2. I’ve been all about the reading lately. It’s all I want to do.
  3. Danielle & Ross came out to visit today. This was their first time seeing the house. We got another bottle of wine (yay!) which we drank at like noon. Haha. I love giving the tour of the house. It’s fun.
  4. Tonight is D&D and pizza with the kiddos.
  5. OMG you guys…we can watch Netflix again. I plan on doing a It’s Always Sunny binge watch after the kids go to bed tonight.
  6. I’ve been trying to stay off the internet as much as possible. For reasons.
  7. LOVE. It’s all about love. I’m going to keep spreading love. I’m going to be positive. I’m going to be the change I wish to see.

Good Bones

Life is short, though I keep this from my children.
Life is short, and I’ve shortened mine
in a thousand delicious, ill-advised ways,
a thousand deliciously ill-advised ways
I’ll keep from my children. The world is at least
fifty percent terrible, and that’s a conservative
estimate, though I keep this from my children.
For every bird there is a stone thrown at a bird.
For every loved child, a child broken, bagged,
sunk in a lake. Life is short and the world
is at least half terrible, and for every kind
stranger, there is one who would break you,
though I keep this from my children. I am trying
to sell them the world. Any decent realtor,
walking you through a real shithole, chirps on
about good bones: This place could be beautiful,
right? You could make this place beautiful.
– Maggie Smith