random as fuck (and boring too)

I feel terrible today, and I’m straight out of fucks to give. I am quite done with being cooped up at home though. I was so anxious yesterday that I started throwing stuff away and rearranging all the things. The move is at least five months off, but I have a lot of shit so I like to get started early. I figure if stuff is still sitting in boxes from my last move, I should probably get rid of it. 

I’m so sick of politics I could scream. But unlike in the past when I would normally keep my opinions to myself, I have been much more vocal about it recently. I’m tired of feeling like my opinion doesn’t matter. I’m tired of riding the fence and trying to keep things nice. Fuck it. I like what I like. I want what I want. I’ll say what I want. If everyone else can spew their shit all over the internet then so can I. 

I’m drinking my very last Diet Pepsi. I’m hoping Dave will take pity on me and bring me some more later.

What’s the best horror book you have ever read? I want to read something spectacularly scary, which is admittedly very hard to come by because almost nothing scares me. I feel like I’ve read everything worth reading in the genre, but that can’t possibly be true.

I know I’m not supposed to complain about my body, because I have the “ideal” body shape, but I feel like a fat ass. I feel so gross. It’s because I haven’t been exercising as much. It’s because my body fucking hates me and is always in pain. I’m going to have to suck it up, drug up, and get my ass back on the treadmill. I’d love to redo 30 Day Shred, but fuck it’s hard on my joints. I can’t even blame that on getting old. Gotta blame it on psoriatic arthritis. 

I love Trader Joes. I love their frozen food selection. Almost everything I’ve ever eaten from there has been good. Dave doesn’t like it because he has bad memories of being forced to eat that stuff when he was married. I’ve agreed that I will never force it upon him, which is easy because he’s the cook of the relationship anyway, but I’m not giving it up either. We have agreed that some nights we will each prepare our own dinner. Some of my favorite nights are when I come home from work, pop in a frozen meal, open a bottle of wine, and read.

I read something earlier about women hating on other women for posting nudes or otherwise provocative pics. I wish I had the nerve to post a “sexy” pic of myself. Even if the person is seeking attention, so fucking what? I believe that most of the time the cutting down of women by other women comes from a place of jealousy and insecurity. I don’t want to encourage that sort of behavior. As women, we need to support each other. Life is hard enough without adding in this sort of petty bullshit. 

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